61 Comments

  1. A brave and honest post lovely. I have no real understanding of politics.

    I too done as much research as I could but even after reading and listening to the pros and cons I was still none the wiser of what to do! Which is probably why I chose to remain. Why change something I don’t understand?! I think a lot of people didn’t understand but chose to leave instead.

    I agree it was never our decision to make. Since the results there has been so much hatred and upset Xx

  2. As an American, my opinion is only that, an opinion that doesn’t count for anything in the long run. I had no vote, and I’m not sure what I would have voted for, anyway.

    “I tried to see past the media’s slewed campaigns that took one side or the other and only presented evidence that agreed with their views. I tried to find impartial people. It wasn’t easy.” I’ve found that it’s more and more difficult to find impartial opinions in the media. People make up their minds, then go to media outlets which reinforce their opinions.

  3. Lucy

    Great post, you did your research and made a considered opinion on what you thought best, and you can’t ask for more than that.
    I voted remain, but I agree with you that the vote should never have happened, that it’s divided us and pitched us all against each other. Whether they go ahead with Article 50 or not, there needs to be a lot of work done by everyone to start working together, stop all the hatred and get through whatever comes in the future

  4. I don’t take these comments personally, because if I did, that would mean I agreed with them on some level.

    Bravo! Look, you did you due diligence and made a decision based on what you learned. No one can fault you for that.

  5. As an American, I have no dog in the fight, so I have no opinion one way or the other. We have our own political mess coming up, so I have no stones to throw.

  6. Great post on the subject. I’m across the pond and I was watching the drama on Twitter and it was just ridiculous what people were spewing. So few were being level headed about it. It’s nice to see rational voices speaking up.

  7. Louise (Little Hearts, Big Love)

    I really respect you for writing this and being so honest about your decisions for voting. I have to confess that I have felt so incredibly angry and worried over the way the vote went but have tried not to attack others when expressing my feelings on social media. Although my vote was different from yours, I fully respect your reasons for voting that way and your choice to have done so. I also feel that the referendum shouldn’t have happened and that both sides should have been better at presenting facts rather than spin which both sides are guilty of. Trying to make a well-informed decision was not easy.

    • Thank you Louise. As I said in my post, I can understand why people feel angry and want to express that, but it’s a shame so much of it is hateful (on both sides). I really think the whole campaign has been a disaster that has just led to violence and it should never have happened. Thanks for commenting 🙂

  8. Dear Debbie, Thank you for writing with such integrity and I although I voted to remain in the union and strongly disagree with the decision the country made, I felt that you’d really thought through everything before voting. Firstly i completely agree the Referendum shouldn’t have happened any more than someone like me being made Chancellor of the Exchequer. I voted Remain, for though I could see the lies on both sides, I heard the increasing rise of the Far Right voices fuelled by Farage (though he’s always careful to distance himself from the extremists), especially their bile and gloating directly at the family of Jo Cox after her murder by one of their supporters. My great-grandparents and great aunts were all gassed to death or burnt alive by the Nazis and the rhetoric of the neo-fascists we see here began in the same way in 1930’s Germany with a small number of yobs and thugs. My fear is now we are no longer part of the EU, whether the economy recovers or not, we have set in place a strategy for countries like France, Austria, Germany, Holland and others with strengthening racist groups to break away and leave Europe as disunited as it was exactly 100 years ago on the anniversary of the 60,000 who died in the first day alone at the Battle of the Somme. With Scotland now on the brink of leaving and Northern Ireland too, I regret that The Queen will live to see the Kingdom so devoted her life to, fragmented and despised by the rest of the world for bringing disunity, insecurity and financial meltdown. Sectarian violence cant be that far away in NI once the voices of the Republican parties become stronger.
    The morning the poll result was declared, a few of us were taking in the momentous events before going off to work. One of the Mums at my son’s school stopped by on the verge of tears. Her husband, had just made 20 of his employees, many of them personal friends, redundant. This is going on across the country as well as for many of our trading partners in Europe who are also affected by increased tariffs. I can’t see a silver lining myself and feel I’ve let down my son and all his cousins and their generation, handing them on a country that will struggle to cope with rising poverty, division and racial tension in years to come. Jo x

    • You make an extremely good point here Jo. The level of racist hate attacks that we have seen since the decision was made is terrifying, and I only hope that the justice system makes a very strict example of them. Whatever anyone’s beliefs about border control are, attacking people is not, and never will be, the answer. That’s the one thing I do hate about the result – I hate the fact that I now live in a country where people from other countries can no longer feel safe, and I agree that these people’s actions are scarily close to Nazism. My heart broke for Jo Cox’s family, as both sides used her death in their campaigns. Thanks for comment x

  9. It’s interesting to read through your thought process. I voted to remain and I didn’t agonize over it in the manner you have. For me it was simple, I’ve lived and worked in two European Countries and want that for my children too. I also listened to the Editor of the Economist speak and she nailed it. Frankly it was a no brainer for me. I worry that many voted out of anger and are hoping for a major fix which I doubt will happen. The result has given legitimacy to some pretty unpleasant views which some people are now more confident to share. This was fuelled by the focus on immigrants and this is a focus for many people anger. I live in Cambridge and 70% of us voted to remain. I am absolutely gutted and worried for the future long and short term. In one week our country is in absolute chaos.

    • Thank you. For me, it was too big a decision to make without doing some research first, but if you felt strongly one way then that was decision made. I hate that the racists in the country are using this as a platform to spread hate and attack people.

  10. I didn’t vote obviously, living in Ireland. I said I didn’t think this decision should have been up to the people to make as there are so many complex & interrelated factors that regular people would never consider. I think a lot of people voted to leave because they wanted a change, I hope racism wasn’t the leading cause – I know well it’s not in your case but a lot of people are taking it that way. The decision will effect brits living abroad & their ability to stay in the countries they consider home. There’s a lot to it. Only time will tell if it was the right decision or not. I certainly agree it’s not the time for hatred or divide – I hope people can come together again soon. x

    • Thanks Becky 🙂 I find it hard to believe that the government didn’t see this coming, all the hatred and fall out. There’s no way this referendum should have happened. The only reason it did was because David Cameron was too over confident that remain would win. Even if it had, I think we still would have seen a lot of trouble and uncertainty now.
      The really sad thing is that for a small minority of people, it was about racism, and unfortunately, those people are extremely vocal. To continue trading in the EU, we will still have to leave our borders open to European people as we do now, so anyone who voted on the assumption that we would close our borders are going to be very disappointed.
      I hope so too! x

  11. Sarah - Mum & Mor

    You are one of the most pleasant and coherent leave voters I’ve encountered. Your opinion is well thought out and you’re not seething with hate.

    There’s so much hatred and fear-mongering on both sides of the camp and a lot of uncertainty.

    What’s done is done. Things have to be sorted out now, but I fear the main leave campaigners jumping ship isn’t really giving me any faith.

    As a British expat, I’m still concerned about what will happen. #BloggerClubUK

    • Thank you. I agree, we have to find a way to put all the hatred aside and move forward. Personally, I always thought Boris Johnson was a bit if a joke, and by stepping down he has proved it. Let’s just hope that May has a plan!

  12. Emma

    A very brave and balanced post. We have to vote for what we believe in and we shouldn’t be judged on our beliefts. I have written a post about the aftermath of it and how in some cases this result is now being used as an excuse for racism. They are worrying times at the moment #bloggerclubuk

    • Thank you. I agree that it has been used as an excuse for racism. I think racists really thought that people would back them up now, but luckily, the majority of the people are standing up against them. This has got to be sorted, no one should be living in fear!

  13. Such a great post, I had to click on it when I saw the title. I thought long and hard about writing on this topic and then decide not to because I can sometimes be ‘a bit in your face’. I imagined that people would be shocked by my opinion. Back to your post, I think you summarise this debate all so well. I am so tired of turning the tv on and documentaries showing you that people who voted out were either racist or stupid (or both). Being myself French living in the UK, I could not vote but I do feel that I would have been on the same side as you. Such a sad thing really….Politicians and EU just disappointed us so much that we don’t believe in them anymore. I am surprised that the UK voted out, like you, I thought that people will vote out of fear. Let’s see what happens next and let’s hope people stop asking about another referendum… It’s against the core principle of democracy. The majority wins! Fabulous post, as usual. You’re far from being an idiot in my opinion 😏 For what it’s worth…
    #bloggerclubuk.

    • I was in two minds myself, but in the end I decided I had to post it. I think the media are adding a lot of unnecessary fuel to the fire at the minute by only choosing certain people’s views that are far from the views of the majority. I think now we just have to move forward and accept the decision. Ultimately, this referendum has caused so much trouble and having another one would add to it. I believe having another one now would be the political equivalent of giving in to a child’s tantrum. Thank you 🙂

  14. You were very brave to write this post. If only our politicians could have set out their arguments in such a coherent manner, and thought through the consequences of the referendum in the first place, we would not be in the turmoil that we find ourselves in today.
    The hate that this vote has stirred up is truly frightening and I hope that people, regardless of the way they voted, will unite to stamp it out before it truly gets out of hand.
    This WAS a referendum and we have yet to see what the Government opts to do but, at the rate at which our leaders are abandoning us, I can’t help but think the ship is sinking fast. 🙁

    • Thank you. Yes, there were a lot of smoke screens and lies on both sides and I believe a lot of that lead us to the point where there is so much hatred and violence. I hope that too – no one in this country should be living in fear, regardless of their nationality.
      There’s still every chance the government will choose to not leave. I just hope May has a plan for whatever she decides to do and gets it in place quickly.

  15. Like you I didn’t think Leave would win, purely because I thought when push came to shove people would avoid change. It has been fascinating to see the reaction since (and some what horrifying) I look forward to seeing what the implications are longer term x

  16. I really don’t think we had enough information about what it all meant and to be honest, I’m not sure a bunch of amateurs (i.e. the British public) should have been allowed to choose. The respected professionals – economists, politicians, leaders of industry – should have actually determined the impact of both outcomes and made an informed decision for us. #BloggerClubUK

  17. From across the pond Debbie, I feel your pain! Americans have been divided since Bush’s second term in office and it has only gotten worse over the years and now with the upcoming election, I’m seriously at a loss as whether or not to even vote. That’s how bad it is. I have voted in every election since I turned 18 and this is the first one that I’m actually considering not voting in because of all the damage both the republican and Democrat camps have done to further divide this country. The media makes it even worse to fuel the flames!
    I am hurting for my people. All the hate and fear is just too much and to try and raise kids in the middle of all of this really sucks!
    And to now see the UK in the same situation…I’m hurting for you. This unrest we’ve had over here has taken it’s toll. I feel for the UK. To see the hate and division happening somewhere else is like watching it happen here all over again. I love that you made your case for voting the way you did.
    It’s like over here, when Obama was constantly being stone-walled to the point where eventually he just gave up (which is no excuse in my opinion), everyone who voted for him heard so much hate on social media by the republicans.We were called stupid. We were called pansies and liberal extremists.
    I voted for Obama because I really believed he would change things. I was wrong. For your leaders to bail now, in the midst of all of this just goes to show that leaders on both sides of the pond are not true leaders. A true leader stands tall and weathers the storm.
    You post was also the most coherent and most educational one I’ve seen so thank you for the education Debbie! #bloggerclubuk

    • It is so sad to watch people from both sides spreading hate and tearing each other down. I don’t know a lot about the presidential race in the USA, only the twisted version the media portrays but it seems so similar to what’s happening here. Everyone has an opinion, which is fair enough, but then everyone seems to want to spread hate to the people on the opposing side.
      I think wanting change is such a valid reason for voting. From the limited information I had, I really thought Obama would bring about change too. I totally agree that a true leader leads in the troubled times as well as the good, and to walk away in the midst of this is atrocious, although I do believe that whoever takes over, which looks like it’s going to be May, will at least come in prepared for what’s happening and hopefully with a plan.
      Thank you 🙂

  18. Helen Needham

    Brexit is one of the most emotive subjects that i have come across.

    Last night I was at a dinner with colleagues and Brexit came up – it was a passionate discussion with views from both exit and remain votes being expressed.

    What struck me the most was that this was the first time in my lifetime that people have got so passionate about what happens and expressed their views about what they want to see change.

    For me the level of passion is great to see, and i hope that going forward that we all find a way to come together despite our different views.

  19. Helen Needham

    Brexit is one of the most emotive subjects that i have come across.

    Last night I was at a dinner with colleagues and Brexit came up – it was a passionate discussion with views from both exit and remain votes being expressed.

    What struck me the most was that this was the first time in my lifetime that people have got so passionate about what happens and expressed their views about what they want to see change.

    For me the level of passion is great to see, and i hope that going forward that we all find a way to come together despite our different views.

    #bloggerclubuk

    • I totally agree – Brexit seems to have gotten everyone interested in politics and how the country is ran. If we can take that passion and funnel it into something that remains civil and sensible, it will be a great thing for the country.

  20. It is such a difficult one, no one had a crystal ball to predict what the long term outcome will be. As a remain voter I was upset and yes angry at the decision but equally I respected it, I respected it as the democratic opinion. I would rather have a say and lose than not be afforded a say at all and that is key. I take your poin to about project fear and think there is something in it, hopefully it will be a lesson to all. #bloggerclubuk

    • I can fully understand why people who wanted to remain would feel angry, but as you say, there has to be a level of respect there too. Being angry is one thing, spreading hate (and I mean both sides here) is another entirely. It is good to have a say, but as this was only really an opinion poll and doesn’t have to be honoured, I feel like it stirred up a lot of trouble for Cameron’s political agenda rather than for the good of the country.

  21. Great post Debbie. I really admire your honesty and thinking. We should all be allowed to have our own view point and to express an opinion without fear of reprimand or abuse. I’ve never known the nation to be so divided and for politics to be such a farce! I voted Remain and admit that I was really upset and worried when I heard the results. I still do worry, but I think we need to get on with it now and pull together as a country. As you say, it could mean an opportunity for us. I was a featured #BloggerClubUK blogger last week with my post about Time for The Hating to Stop and it was all about this. The violence and abuse I’ve witnessed firstly on social media from both sides to each other and then the prejudice and xenophobia from certain people was just awful. I really hope we can all move forward. Thanks for hosting #BloggerClubUK x

    • Thank you. It’s scary how the government seems to be falling apart, they need to get themselves together and find a way to unite the people, the divide is really bad. I totally agree – people on both sides are showing so much hate, and I don’t think it’s right that people from other countries now feel unwelcome and are left living in fear. The level of xenophobia is something I never would have predicted. Obviously, there’s always been a few that have these awful views, but now it suddenly seems like people think it’s ok to spread hate and violence and it’s got to stop x

  22. Marina Ilieva

    This is brilliant, Debbie! Honest, brave and intelligent opinion. I am not British, I am an EU citizen who has decided to settle in your beautiful country together with my family. Similarly to my compatriots, I am supposed to hate the way you voted. But I don’t. I couldn’t. Because I understand your point and I respect it. They say we should leave UK and return to our homeland. I say, if you allow us, we’ll do our best to stay and be part of your friendly society. Maybe, it will be harder now but I believe it’s for the better. xx #BloggerClubUK

    • Thank you. I believe having people from other countries makes our society stronger. I personally don’t have a problem with Europeans (and non-Europeans) living here, and I hate the way people are using this to make people feel unwelcome here. It should be seen as positive that people want to come here and live. I think the majority of people here would agree and hate that people from other countries are being made to feel unwelcome, but as always, the media only report the bad! I really hope you and your family do choose to stay 🙂 x

  23. This is perhaps the second article I’ve read which has made me really consider the other viewpoint and question my own opinion. If only everyone had done such careful research and thought the issues through so rationally. There seems to be a lot of hysteria flying about. I 100% agree with your last two paragraphs, that’s for sure. #BloggerClubUK

    • I think there was a lot of hysteria and I believe a lot of people voted as a knee jerk reaction without any consideration of the actual facts. Thank you, I firmly believe this referendum should never have happened!

  24. Laura @ Life with Baby Kicks

    The hysteria. The people that are being shown as the “typical” leave voters and someone else stepping down every other day is rocking confidence in Britain. Media skews and political turmoil. It’s a worrying and turbulent time.

    This sums it up Debbie:

    The referendum should never have happened. It should have been a decision made by elected officials without the need to open it up and split the nation.

    • It is worrying, and I completely agree that the media are not helping in the slightest. All they report on is the racist idiots and the violent remain protests, why not show a more representative person on both sides? I get that the sensationalism sells more papers, but at what cost?

  25. What a brave post!
    Good for you for speaking up, although no one would expect you to be explaining your vote. It’s your free will to choose as you see fit. It’s great to hear so many people did actually research to the best of their abilities before voting. I was in the Remain camp for personal reasons – our town is not effected by immigration or anything negative to do with the EU in as much that directly effects us as a family, And we love holidaying in Europe and want to continue doing so with ease of free movement. I think you are absolutely on the momey when you say the referendum should never have happened. I dont think there was enough flat out facts given, there was no structured plan presented by Brexit OR by Remain in terms of change to EU policy if we do remain.
    Actually I thought they should have sent some sort of questionnaire around and those that answered it and sent it back then received their ballot paper. It would have weeded out those that hadn’t got the foggiest what they were voting for at least!! xxx

    • Thank you. It really shouldn’t have happened. I know Cameron was confident remain would win, but he must have known it would cause a lot of friction either way. And I agree, the policies were not thought out or properly explained. No one seems to have any sort of plan. The plans should have been in place and ready to go for both possible outcomes.
      I love the idea of a questionnaire, like you say, at least then people would have had to prove they actually understood the issues! x

  26. An imperfect mum (Catie)

    I can not give an intelligent opinion as I do not know enough about politics and as an EXPAT I have not religiously followed UK politics the last 11 years. However, my northern based family followed the majority in the north and voted like you. I feel that it was a protest made like you said by people who feel that the North is largely ignored. A very interesting post!

  27. Hi Debbie, I admire your honesty and there is nothing wrong with standing by what you believe to be right. No one can say for sure what will happen next or how England leaving the EU will affect the country ten years from now. It could be for the better, it may not be. What is important now is that people start accepting the idea and that the government sorts itself out and starts working toward a better future.

    I don’t understand all the nastiness that has come from this vote, but I’m guessing it’s coming from people with low IQs.

    I would have voted to remained to stay, partly because I enjoy living in Greece and want to remain here, but I also think there is a lot to be said for safety in numbers. If countries stick together and work on maintaining a respectful relationship, it could well help make the world a safer place to be.

    xx

    • Thank you. I agree – we need to move forward now, and the government need to get their act together and actually lead. I think you’re right about the low IQs! I am hopeful that we can still have a respectful relationship with other countries because it could well make all the difference regarding safety x

  28. Kathy @ Hopes, Dreams and Chocolate

    A very well written post. I voted Remain but strongly felt we shouldn’t have been given the responsibility to make this decision one way or the other. It was a black and white vote for a situation which is completely grey and blurred. It is the intolerance and hate which has strengthened due to this issue which worries me the most. Whichever way people voted I respect, but there is no need for the intolerance. Thank you so much for sharing this post. Xx Kathy #BloggerClubUK

    • Thank you. I completely agree this was never a decision we should have had to make. I also agree about the intolerance. People are always going to disagree about political issues, but I hate how personal its all gotten. The hate has to stop, and I really hope the government have some sort of plan to reunite the people sooner rather than later x

  29. Trista, Domesticated Momster

    Love your honesty as always Deb. I know nothing about the politics in your country as I can hardly keep up with my own in the US and our idiots who are running for president. There are people saying they will move to another country if so and so makes president but the fact is there’s problems in every country. Nowhere is perfect. And you are right when you say there’s too much hate in this world which sadly mostly runs on religion and politics. Thanks for hostessing #bloggerclubuk :))

    • Thank you 🙂 I don’t know a whole lot about the presidential candidates, but from what I’ve seen, I wouldn’t particularly want either of them. But you’re totally right – everywhere has it’s problems, and the grass is always greener syndrome will soon be broken by anyone who does jump ship and realises that other countries have political unrest too. Religion and politics sure do have a lot to answer for at the moment with all the hate.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.